I took Joshua to school yesterday as there was a problem with School Transport and so I was delighted to see him smile at and greet classmates and staff alike, he genuinely seemed pleased to be there. So I went back to work, late, contented that we were getting life back on track after his spell of illness. I kept my mobile close by all day in case I was summonsed to rescue him, but no call came, until Transport rang again to say that they would be late picking him up as the exhast had fallen off their taxi! This meant an even longer than normal day for Joshua’s first day back and my heart sank and I began to feel guilty for sending him back to school too soon and then for subjecting him to a long first day back.
Yorkshire Grandma sent me a text at 4.30 to say that he was happy to be home and quite lively, which reassured me. But when I got home from work, nearer 6pm, he was curled up on the settee, under a fleecy blanket, not quite asleep but looking very grey and he had rejected all offers of food and drink. So the guilt returned : that sense that I had sent him to school too soon, simply to suit my own work commitments.I regretted once again that Joshua could not tell me just how ill he felt, so that I could assess the situation first thing in the morning. I got cross , once again, that I had to be a psychic fortune-teller over how his day might pan out.
I then gave myself a good talking to, as what was done was done; he had slept at school rather than sleeping at home, so no real harm had come to him and I had given him an opportunity to be entertained by a change of scene and people. He had attended the Easter bonnet parade, even though he had slept through it, and had brought a chocolate egg home as his reward. School activities had not been enough to wake him up, but it might have been. I then noticed that he was dozing on the settee and was not fast asleep,he was simply a drifter, so I warmed up some spaghetti carbonara for him and I was delighted that he sat up and ate it all. Food is usually one of Joshua’s favourite things and a bath is another, so when he accepted my offer of a bath too, I really felt as though we were back on track. He enjoyed his bath and happily went to bed after it.
Now we just have to go through that school/home decision one more time later this morning, for after today, he is on Easter school holidays, so we do not have that particular dilemma for over a fortnight, which will be a decent break for us both.